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It's all good in the grass.

The only reason people order you is because you deliver in 10 minutes or less.

When you take 30+ minutes to deliver, it becomes a matter of comparing your food to other places that take as long to deliver, and you never win in that battle.

Get ya shit together.


I really like my voice. It’s soothing and inviting.

That is all.


Hey, feelings, can you maybe go away?


Sometimes I need to buy something online and I put it off because my credit card is in my bag which isn’t within reaching distance of my bed.


There is a man knocking on my neighbor’s door who will not leave until she gives him his lighter.

According to this man, my neighbor is a “fucking cunt.”

How I’d love to be a huge strong dude and intimidate people to go away sometimes…

Maybe you oughta reevaluate who the fucking cunt is when you’re the one disturbing everyone living on this floor by yelling at someone through a door?


Any time I try to enter my full address into online forms, it ends up being some weird amalgamation of parts of my Carbondale, Tucson and Los Angeles addresses.


5 am after a night of five drinks is a weird time to feel productive, but by god if I won’t be seizing this opportunity and getting some work done.


We live in a small township, or series of townships, which sometimes expand in geographic area, but only if our government faces the proper conditions and can mine enough ore and grow enough wheat that year (why being able to increase space and population is dependent solely on ore and wheat production, we cannot say.) There are two to three other governments constantly competing with us for these same resources, and those jackasses have the nerve to screw us over in all kinds of ways, whether it be monopolizing the entirety of our food supply, thieving and preventing us from receiving certain resources, (although, to be honest, our system for receiving resources in the first place is a bit unjust, considering that townships unlucky enough to be built surrounding shitty production areas are SOL) or using their militia to control what we are able to receive.And DON’T get me started on the political scrutiny we get from the government of those other townships. I mean, stick to your own damn business, and don’t tell US when or how to use our militia, build our infrastructure, etc. Get a life, for real.We don’t even know wtf lies beyond the ocean surrounding us. I mean, there is clearly something, since we have ports that bring in supplies from some mysterious place, but who knows where. I once heard from a buddy that we could find out, for a price…

We live in a small township, or series of townships, which sometimes expand in geographic area, but only if our government faces the proper conditions and can mine enough ore and grow enough wheat that year (why being able to increase space and population is dependent solely on ore and wheat production, we cannot say.) There are two to three other governments constantly competing with us for these same resources, and those jackasses have the nerve to screw us over in all kinds of ways, whether it be monopolizing the entirety of our food supply, thieving and preventing us from receiving certain resources, (although, to be honest, our system for receiving resources in the first place is a bit unjust, considering that townships unlucky enough to be built surrounding shitty production areas are SOL) or using their militia to control what we are able to receive.

And DON’T get me started on the political scrutiny we get from the government of those other townships. I mean, stick to your own damn business, and don’t tell US when or how to use our militia, build our infrastructure, etc. Get a life, for real.

We don’t even know wtf lies beyond the ocean surrounding us. I mean, there is clearly something, since we have ports that bring in supplies from some mysterious place, but who knows where. I once heard from a buddy that we could find out, for a price…


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